All in a day's work!

I was insanely depressed this morning that I almost cried the first two periods of the day. 3rd period cheered me up, but I was already in a sensitive mood and then I got back my calculus test and I made stupid decisions and i failed with a 54 and I was really expecting a 80 something at the least a 70. But I got a 54. I just died.

I felt like shit, I was on the brink of tears in both classes, I did tear up but no tears fell.

Choir cheered me up a bit, I have a small crush on this sophomore who stands behind me and she wasn't here yesterday. So, it cheered me up today, and annoying little chick next to me wasn't here for part of the class. So I was happier, she has my sarcastic humor so we can play along for a small bit, but I don't really know her, only the small bit we talk it class. I'm sure we would hit it off, but alas, she is straight.

Music always cheers me up, now band was shit.

I survived though. My day was okay.

I won't lie though, I have been feeling shit lately because Gil hasn't talked to me much and it is bothering me.

I am feeling better, not on the brink of tears! But I can't shake the depressing feeling, almost forgot what it felt, almost.

ALSO, the reason I was going to make this post. Today after school I was talking to my friend Jacque and then my crush was calling me (she is not in band) outside the band hall doors. Now after I finish talking, I go get my letterman from my locker and I put it on because it was fucking freezing when I went out to lunch, and sure enough it was fucking freezing!

I walk out and this girl is in a T-shirt and with out a jacket. She hugs me and then put her arm in my jacket. Now, I've trained myself to not feel anything when she touches, grabs, hugs, attacks, or has any physical contact with me, because I am super obvious. So I didn't think anything of it, she's always touchy feely. And it was the wrong side of me where she couldn't hug me.

Later on she put her arm on the right side, and hugged me with said arm and then eventually just put both arms in. She was hugging me under my jackets (yes I had two on, I was too lazy to take the light one off). We were surrounded so I kept cool, I didn't really feel anything, then again I really wasn't feeling anything in general. So I'm all enjoying the hug and I really want to stay there holding *cough* I mean HUGGING her XD but I offered my bus friends a ride home. So I had to leave my crush to freeze :(

So as I talked to my friends and I called another and put her on speaker phone, I was like, wow. Maybe I'm AT LAST over her. I get home and discover nope. I'm not. I'm actually very turned on, crap, not over her. It's a bit annoying but I never see her now, so it will go away :) hopefully!

Oh yeah, she's also straight. Stupid straight girls XD